It's National Adoption Month
HEYYYY, it's November. Know what that means? It's National Adoption Month. Yes, there is a month that celebrates adoption. Why shouldn't there be? We celebrate the most random things in this country, might as well celebrate something worth celebrating for once.
This is obviously a very special topic to me, and for those who don't know or haven't caught on, I'm adopted. I was adopted and brought to America when I was 4 months old. I read an article a few days ago and it titled something like "16 Things You Learn As An Adopted Family", and one of the facts was "you will know what a real mom or dad is". I remember one time when I was growing up, someone told me that because I was adopted that I didn't have a real mom or dad. I also remember being corrected by my parents when I told them that. A real mom or dad aren't the people who gave you life, they're the people who take care of you when you're sick, teach you how to tie your shoes, help you with homework, etc. Just because my birth mother never did any of that for me, doesn't make her any less of a real mom to me. My birth mother is just as much a real mom to me, as my adopted mother is.
Being adopted and from a different country, I've had my fair share of dumb people who like to try and make fun of me. Luckily, I was raised in a family who taught me how to ignore them and not let the ignorant words coming out of their mouth bother me. Sometimes it's not that easy though. I had people make fun of my eyes all my life, they'd pull their eyes back and make them real small. Yeah, I get it, my eyes are smaller than everyone else's. That joke stopped being funny in the 2nd grade, you're in high school now, it's time to stop. It's one thing to make a joke about my eyes, I'm not the only Asian with smaller almond shaped eyes in this world, but it's the words you say that will stick with me forever.
I remember a few instances in high school, particularly my junior year of high school. We had to write a persuasive essay, so naturally I wrote it about adoption (I think I wrote about adoption more times than I can count during school). Well, I thought my paper was pretty dang good, had a point to it, it had facts, it had all the information you needed to know about adoption (I like to say I'm kind of an expert on the topic, and if I'm not then my parents sure are). I turned my paper in and knew I was going to get an A, I mean how could I not? I'm not saying I was being super cocky, but there are just some things you do and you just know that it's right. I got my paper back and there was a big fat F on the front of it with a little side note that simply stated that I know nothing about adoption or adopted kids and I shouldn't assume the feelings of adopted children. Yup, that pissed me off. (Now I'm not one to do certain confrontation well. Lots of times I just go with the flow or keep my mouth shut so it doesn't result in arguments, but not this time). I walked up to my teacher and asked why I got an F and again, she told me the same thing she wrote on my paper. By this time I was so mad I didn't know if I was going to yell, walk out of the classroom, flip her desk, or what. I looked at her, put my paper right in front of her, pointed to her little note she had put on it, and simply told her as nicely as I could "I'm adopted. I was adopted when I was 4 months old. From a different country. My parents are white and I look nothing like them. I'm not assuming the feelings of adopted children, because I know exactly how they feel, because it's how I feel." After all that happened my parents were able to talk to the principal and get my grade changed luckily.
Anyways, that entire story to reiterate that your real parents don't have to be the people that gave you life. They're the ones that pray for you, love you no matter what, and always have your back.
This is obviously a very special topic to me, and for those who don't know or haven't caught on, I'm adopted. I was adopted and brought to America when I was 4 months old. I read an article a few days ago and it titled something like "16 Things You Learn As An Adopted Family", and one of the facts was "you will know what a real mom or dad is". I remember one time when I was growing up, someone told me that because I was adopted that I didn't have a real mom or dad. I also remember being corrected by my parents when I told them that. A real mom or dad aren't the people who gave you life, they're the people who take care of you when you're sick, teach you how to tie your shoes, help you with homework, etc. Just because my birth mother never did any of that for me, doesn't make her any less of a real mom to me. My birth mother is just as much a real mom to me, as my adopted mother is.
Being adopted and from a different country, I've had my fair share of dumb people who like to try and make fun of me. Luckily, I was raised in a family who taught me how to ignore them and not let the ignorant words coming out of their mouth bother me. Sometimes it's not that easy though. I had people make fun of my eyes all my life, they'd pull their eyes back and make them real small. Yeah, I get it, my eyes are smaller than everyone else's. That joke stopped being funny in the 2nd grade, you're in high school now, it's time to stop. It's one thing to make a joke about my eyes, I'm not the only Asian with smaller almond shaped eyes in this world, but it's the words you say that will stick with me forever.
I remember a few instances in high school, particularly my junior year of high school. We had to write a persuasive essay, so naturally I wrote it about adoption (I think I wrote about adoption more times than I can count during school). Well, I thought my paper was pretty dang good, had a point to it, it had facts, it had all the information you needed to know about adoption (I like to say I'm kind of an expert on the topic, and if I'm not then my parents sure are). I turned my paper in and knew I was going to get an A, I mean how could I not? I'm not saying I was being super cocky, but there are just some things you do and you just know that it's right. I got my paper back and there was a big fat F on the front of it with a little side note that simply stated that I know nothing about adoption or adopted kids and I shouldn't assume the feelings of adopted children. Yup, that pissed me off. (Now I'm not one to do certain confrontation well. Lots of times I just go with the flow or keep my mouth shut so it doesn't result in arguments, but not this time). I walked up to my teacher and asked why I got an F and again, she told me the same thing she wrote on my paper. By this time I was so mad I didn't know if I was going to yell, walk out of the classroom, flip her desk, or what. I looked at her, put my paper right in front of her, pointed to her little note she had put on it, and simply told her as nicely as I could "I'm adopted. I was adopted when I was 4 months old. From a different country. My parents are white and I look nothing like them. I'm not assuming the feelings of adopted children, because I know exactly how they feel, because it's how I feel." After all that happened my parents were able to talk to the principal and get my grade changed luckily.
Anyways, that entire story to reiterate that your real parents don't have to be the people that gave you life. They're the ones that pray for you, love you no matter what, and always have your back.
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